Feeling Change In The Air

First published on June 20, 2017

It's hot in London at the moment. Almost as hot as it gets in the UK. When I left my flat this morning, though, as I stepped out, I sensed a change in the air. The weather, I thought, is changing. Now as it turns out, I was wrong. I'm now on the train, sweating in the stifling heat with the sun beating down on the un-air-conditioned train. 

But something struck me about that. There's a sense of relief in the heat ending. Now some of that is because I don't sleep well when it's warm, and it would be nice to go somewhere without sweating, but I love the sun, really, so the idea of a return to grey London being grey London struck me as strange. The feeling was familiar. It's the same feeling I get when I realise I'm getting better after a cold. And it's very similar to the feeling that the week is coming to an end and the weekend is coming. I've equated that weekend feeling, the Friday feeling, with Freedom in the past. But I now suspect there's another element at play. Change. 

Because that's what I'm feeling when I realise the weather is about to break, and that's what I'm feeling when I sense my cold is passing. And that the working week is coming to an end. 

Change is a powerful thing for humans. There's something undeniably exciting about it, and I think part of this is because there's a strong resistance in most people to the idea of being trapped. To things being exactly like this forever. There's a fear of it. What if it is this hot forever? What if I never get better?

And that's why the sense that things are changing, right in front of us, gives that flicker of excitement. It is the knowledge that things will be different, and that's exciting. An excitement not always without fear, of course, but it is something new. And in the relief from fear of being trapped is the beckoning of control. With control comes freedom. 

It's very warm on my train, but I love the sun. I'm glad it's here. But when that next drop of rain comes, I will joy in the rush of excitement. Things change.