4 Steps to Getting Into Action and Creating Change In Your Life
First published on October 19, 2018
I finished a book today. That's not that unusual. I'm a reasonably prolific reader, working my way through a number of books each year. The difference about this one is that it took me almost 6 months to read, even though I read it regularly - every week and most working days. Earlier this year, I couldn't find a way to make myself read non-fiction. I just never felt like it. But learning by reading through non-fiction is a part of how I develop myself as a coach (someone once joked 'Your coach is someone who reads books so you don't have to.') And I wanted to read non-fiction, but I just 'couldn't'; I always felt more like reading fiction, switching off in a way that (for me) a brilliant story can help me do.
In the end, here's how I managed to get back into reading non-fiction: I decided I would read for 15 minutes - roughly the amount of time it takes to drink my morning coffee - each morning when I am working at home. I would do this every time, as I drank my coffee. And, thus, my worries about reading non-fiction dissipated. Some days I would read so little. Maybe a couple of paragraphs, read over and over again as my mind flew everywhere else but the book. This was not effective reading. But it was reading. Every day. And I kept doing it. I kept making progress. And I got loads from reading the book - an article inspired by it which I posted a couple of weeks ago has now been read over 2,000 times in a fortnight.
I didn't always manage to read. Sometimes I forgot. When I did that, I didn't give up. I recommitted.
That is essentially the same pattern, the same practice, that led to this post being written. I'm thinking of putting together a book of these 12-minute pieces, partly to showcase my work and collect it all into one place, and partly to say: look, you can write a book. And all you need is 12 minutes a week, the commitment to sit down and do it, and the choice to recommit when you slip. And that got me thinking about what it is which stops others from taking action. People who know what they want - or at least they say they do - but they don't take action. What I'm about to outline is simple, but not easy. Here is some/most/all of what I've learnt about how to get into action and create things:
Decide on the habit - everything starts with a decision - schedule it, and sit down. No matter what. If you want to write, schedule when you will do it, and then sit down when the time comes. If you want to invite people into a coaching conversation with you, schedule when you will do it and sit down when the time comes. If you want to do exercise in the morning, schedule when you will do it and sit down (or stand up, or run) when the time comes. Easier said than done, but this is fundamental. If you don't create the time for whatever you want, then you can never get it. And time is yours to create: you can choose how you spend that time, and each time you say Yes to a coffee in your writing time or Yes to a lie in during your exercise time, you are saying No to whatever you had chosen. You can choose, so choose.
When you miss that chance, don't beat yourself up. Don't think 'Ah, I'm just someone who can't do X'. Just ask yourself: do I want to do this? If the answer is Yes, then ask, Am I willing to recommit to my schedule? Then recommit, and next time it comes, sit down. If you don't manage that time, either, then ask yourself the questions again. Then recommit, and sit down.
Things are never ready. So don't wait for it. Perfectionsim is Resistance, and the surefire way to beat it is to share before you are ready. Send before you are ready, publish before you are ready. 100% ready is always too much. 80% ready is usually too much. 20% - if you trust Pareto - is probably about right. Share it when you don't think it's ready.
Confidence is a myth. Of course it's not actually a myth, it's a thing. I know that. What's a myth is that you need to have it before you do something. I once wrote about confidence: it's actually just the embodied knowledge that if you take action you can get closer to what you want. Rich Litvin put it more snappily: Confidence is a result, not a requirement. When you take action, when you speak up, when you share your work, when you work out, then AND ONLY THEN, will you become confident.
Everyone doubts themself, or at least they do if they are doing anything that truly matters. EVERYONE. The game, then, is to act in spite of the doubt. And these steps, these are how I do it.